let me introduce myself

I had my baby 11 months ago. Since then I've done extensive research and field practice into the role of the modern mum. I'm married, live in a gorgeous town in the South of England and work as a freelance journalist having given up my full time job.

Frankly, I have it all - or all that I'm interested in having - but I never felt that the 'YummyMummy' badge quite fitted. I felt cheated, felt that I was missing out. And then, I found a gang of my own. The Slummies.

I have designed a quick test to see if you too can join us. Simply answer 'Yes' to one or more of the statements below.

- I love my baby more than life itself but swear not to bore others with the details

- Some of the worst words in the world are 'childbirth', 'breastfeeding' and 'when can we start having sex again'.

- I would spend 5 spare morning minutes putting on make up rather than having breakfast

- I will never, ever go to a supermarket as long as Ocado deliveries exist

I do hope you've joined me. Welcome to the world of the Slummy.